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Prodigal Sex (or, Will the Real Anabaptists Please Stand Up?)

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This is my contribution to Signpost 8: Prodigal Relationships in the Prodigal Christianity Blog Tour. In case you haven’t seen it, here’s Part 1 and Part 2 of my full review of the book. And here are the other entries in the Tour:

Signpost 1: Post-Christendom
Signpost 2: Missio Dei
Signpost 3: Incarnation
Signpost 4: Witness
Signpost 5: Scripture
Signpost 6: Gospel
Signpost 7: Church

Without further ado, let’s get to Signpost 8.

Yeah, this chapter in David Fitch and Geoff Holsclaw’s book is called “Prodigal Relationships,” but I used the admittedly more clickable Prodigal Sex as the title for this post.

And that’s because Signpost 8 talks about sex.

Specifically, this chapter deals with the “sexual issues” and “sexual brokenness” that define our post-Christendom context in North America, the far country that God is calling the church to enter into in a prodigal way in order to redeem that which is lost. And let’s be honest, there is no hotter hot-button topic, culturally speaking, than the topic of sexuality and, specifically, non-traditional sexuality – prodigal sex. Though I’ve expressed gripes with a couple of the ways the authors approached their argument on this topic, I find myself cheering at the big proposal they are making here.

Namely, Dave and Geoff are urging the church to adopt a “welcoming and mutually transforming” posture toward people who express a range of opinion, orientation, or brokenness in the area of sex:

We need to open these spaces in the midst of our lives for sexual redemption. Such a space will invite everyone together with whatever sexual issues he or she carries. We will not consider sexual issues from a distance as if we could make a pronouncement on a single issue and have that somehow solve everything. Instead we will come together locally and commit to love one another, listen to one another, and submit to one another through the work of the Spirit and the word of the Scriptures. We will seek the presence of Christ so that his rule might break in and become visible in our lives. His authority will be made clear through mutually submitting to the gifts of the Spirit. We will ask what is going on in the depths of our lives, our sexual histories, our hurts, our pains. Then we will ask, What is God saying to us? What is God doing? What is God calling us to in these things?… We call these kinds of communities “welcoming and mutually transforming” rather than “welcoming and not affirming” or “welcoming and affirming.”

It is probably apparent that the main “issue” in view is the question of gay relationships and gay marriage. And the spirit behind the welcoming and mutually transforming proposal is a removal of the ideologies (affirming OR not affirming) that tend to close the door to LGBT folks or divide/define the church over opinion on these issues. To remove any visible labels to either effect is to essentially release the work of Jesus the Head in the midst of the community by the Spirit, so that all of these matters may be discerned as people submit to Jesus, the scriptures, the gifts of the Spirit, and each other. Good examples of this kind of discernment/transformation practice are given in the Christian and Missionary Alliance’s approach to polygamy in foreign missions, and in the way the authors’ own congregation, Life on the Vine, has discerned issues like women in pastoral leadership.

At the same time, Dave and Geoff are clear that in their church there’s a general consensus that gay practice is not “normative” for Christians. There is an underlying traditional view of sexuality, and there is thus a gravitational pull toward that center in the life of the community. Yet, despite the claims of some reviewers, the authors are clear that transformation goes both directions, as we are all sexually broken and all in need of wholeness that may come from submitting to each other. Thus, we may have a great deal to learn about intimacy, love, care, and friendship within the sexes from our gay neighbors in the church as we listen in mutually submitted friendship.

The Spirit will bring change and healing to all of us when there is a safe place of acceptance, and that’s a beautiful thing.

But I want to add a further challenge to this welcoming and mutually transforming proposal.

In order to really, truly do away with the ideologies that exclude and divide, and to provide actual safety and acceptance, I believe the church must get its hands out of the legal fight against gay marriage.

This is how my former church plant, Dwell, discerned that issue here in Vermont (the first state to legalize gay marriage through the legislative process). We realized that associating our church’s identity or mission with a legal position that excluded a large number of our friends and neighbors from the civil rights that are granted to those in committed, permanent, straight relationships was contrary to the gospel call of equality, fairness, and welcome at the table. We discerned that gay folks coming into our church community or simply observing from the outside would know, right off the bat, that we were against them if we were literally taking this legal position against them. Moreover, in a positive sense, we knew that the gospel was calling us to be for them and to stand with them as they pursue their civil rights.

We also nuanced the difference between legal marriage and sacramental marriage in our evangelical context, and decided that we would cast a traditional vision of marriage as a sacramental practice of our church, even as we affirmed the right to legal marriage for our gay friends.

And so, in my excitement and fervor for the welcoming and mutually transforming proposal put forward by Dave and Geoff in Prodigal Christianity, I ask:

Will the real anabaptists please stand up?

Will the real destroyers of idolatrous ideology please stand up?

Will the real subverters of the state’s marriage to the church’s politic please stand up?

Will the real holistic gospelers who affirm justice and equality and true personhood as part of the good news please stand up?

Because we can stand up and yet remain rooted in our evangelical commitment and passion.

And if we do, we just might see Jesus create a prodigal church that welcomes and mutually transforms, even as it accepts all people with the unconditional love of the Prodigal God.

What do you think about Dave and Geoff’s “welcoming and mutually transforming” proposal? And what do you think about my challenge? Weigh in!


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